Personal Experience

I've written a lot over the years about the various concerns/problems that my family has faced over the years. Personal experience has taught me to learn to look beyond a behavior in order to understand why a child may be doing certain things.

None speaks more directly to me than when I see a child avoiding going to school. My oldest and youngest suffer from anxiety. The youngest exhibited behaviors that from a "lay-persons" point of view would have smacked of being "oppositional" and "defiant." He did everything as an 8 year old to avoid the place he feared the most . . . school. He complained of stomach aches, head aches, often complaining several times a day that he needed to see the nurse. When he wasn't able to get out of the situation causing the anxiety, he would try to run away, throw tantrums, and just about any other thing you could imagine in order to get to the place he felt the most safe . . . home.

We never excused his behavior, but let me tell you, his third grade year was one that I would not wish upon my worst enemy. So, my antennae tends to get raised when I read something like this. There may be a reason that this student is avoiding going to school & it may have nothing to do with her trying to "scheme" or "to get mom's attention."

Anxiety often leads to depression. Depression can lead to such things like cutting, taking drugs, or something even more drastic, such as suicide. Again, I'm not excusing this student's behavior, but from my own personal experience, I hope that someone looks into the possibility that this student may be suffering from anxiety and then give her the skills and/or the necessary medication to help her.

I've been the frustrated teacher trying to deal with the unruly behavior of a student, but I've also been the parent who has had to help my children through some very difficult times in their lives and have been told by "well-meaning" teachers and administrators that my children were "choosing their behaviors." Sometimes kids do things in order to get the help they need. Sometimes they do not have the words to express what they are feeling. It is up to us to give them this voice and to let them know that their mental illness does not define who they are.

How the hell did this happen?

Happy 18th Birthday!

Today, I officially became the parent of two adults. Our son, Guitar Teen, turns 18 today. He has about 6 weeks until he graduates - I think I can speak for both his dad and I when I say that there were more times than not when we didn't think he'd make it!

3D TV

Has anyone seen the new ad for the 3D television set? In the commercial, it shows a family of three all watching the television with their 3D glasses on.

The thought that came to my mind?

Whose going to keep track of those glasses so that everyone can watch television? Seriously, who amongst us have complained about not being able to find the remote instead of getting off of our asses to get up and actually change the channel from the set?

I think we'll stick to watching 3D at the movies. Of course, we are still stuck in the 90's with our humongous television console that is NOT HD ready ;/

The Thrill of Victory

Our son, Wrestling Fan, competed in his first bench lifting contest.

He not only beat the world record for his age & weight group,

but also the national & state record.

This from a kid who has suffered from extreme anxiety.

He is becoming more & more confident in

himself & his abilities.

The best part? He showed profound respect to his competitor

& the many people who were there to root him on.

He not only showed his physical strength, but most importantly,

his true strength of character.

Yes! We are proud!

Ms_Teacher Sounds Off

There is a lot going on in my school district. Pretty soon, one hundred plus teachers will be out of job along with more than several dozens of our support staff. Schools are closing, class sizes are increasing and we are losing nurses and counselors at an alarming rate. All of this is being done in order to close the gap in funding received by the state due to the economy and our declining enrollment.

So, what I would like to know is that while all of these cuts are taking place, why is it that our district has hired yet another administrator at the district office? No substantial cuts are taking place where it has the least impact on students - administrators who already make substantially more than teachers and support staff - none of them are taking pay cuts OR losing any of their colleagues.

Of course, I expect this kind of thinking from those who are so removed from the reality of teaching day to day. That being said, I was somewhat irritated at a teacher who actually had the audacity to tell me that he should have more rights under the contract than a newer teacher. Due to schools closing, he seemed to believe that if he wanted another teacher's job who teaches the same subject, then he should be able to bump that person out of their job. He was miffed when I told him that our contract doesn't have "bumping" rights. So now I'm curious - are there bumping rights in your contract?