How many parents out there use reverse bribery (rewarding yourself as opposed to your child) to get them to do what you want?
How many parents out there have perfect children who have perfect manners even when you are not present?
How many parents out there have witnessed first hand that as your children get older and become more independent, your kids have a tendency not to always do exactly as you asked?
Respond in comments below. Another post to follow so you can see where I'm headed with this . . .
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12 comments:
1. Picture me sitting on my hands.
2. I don't understand what reverse bribery is...
3. I've been told that my kids ARE polite when we're not present. Sometimes, I'm shocked by this; they often behave better in public than they do at home.
4. Oh, yeah - more independence = much less compliance and cooperation.
Can't wait to see where THIS is going...
1. Heh.
2. What Mrs. Chili said.
3. Ditto number two.
4. *Hand up*
That would be:
1. None I know.
2. Hmmm, I echo Mrs. Chili on this
one.
3. Honestly, I think their manners are far better when I'm not around.
4. Me, me, me!
Seriously??
1. HA HA In case you can't interpret that, it means NO.
2. I don't think I've ever done that, but I don't really understand it.
3. I'm not present, so how would I know? Both my kids are pretty polite though; I hear about it from other people.
4. It just gets worse and worse the more independent they become.
1. You must live in some fantasy world.
2. If this means pouring myself a LARGE margarita, oh, yes.
3. My kids rock for other people. They have managed to survive to adulthood with me, which shows restraint on BOTH sides.
4. Since I raised them to question authority (can we guess which decade I came of age in?), when they become less compliant, aren't they really following my basic agenda?
1. Totally. Wait, wha...?
2. I don't know what this is, but I think it sounds like an excellent strategy. I think this means if I'm clever enough to get my kids to behave, then I get new shoes, right?
3. I do, I do! Wait, wha...?
4. I have not experienced this. My kids have done that from the get go, not just as they've gotten older.
1. Hahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!! Okay, I think I'm done now.
2. I like Ricochet's thinking on this one.
3. Polite in public and for other people, oh yes. Perfect? You are kidding, right?
4. My son (10 yrs) has gotten better at doing what I ask as he's gotten older, because he has more self-control. But he's not quite a teenager yet, so um... we'll see.
Its the wish for every parent that their children should be successful in life. But I think there would be only 2% of the parents having children which are successful in life.
1. I don't know whether to laugh or cry over this question.
2. Does eating Reese's peanut butter cups that I stole from their Easter baskets to console myself while I'm doing the things that I asked them to do count as reverse bribery?
3. No one has perfect children. I know several people who act as if they do have perfect children and those children do behave well in public but I refuse to believe that they are actually perfect. My children behave well in public and I know just how far from perfect they are.
4. I would definitely trade them doing exactly as I ask if it meant they were becoming independent. But.. they aren't independent and they still don't do as I ask!
Well all I can add is you were not talking about my kids, not the ones I raised and not the ones I teach.
Haha this is so true. It takes hours before i get to do what my parents asked me to do! :)
The kids I teach are different from these you're talking about... It only depends on how you handle them.
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