Ms-Teacher Sounds Off! (3)

Dear Parent/Grandparent/Guardian;

I know that you love the child in your life. I get that because, seriously, as a mom of three myself, I have had more than one instance of when the old bitchiness mother bear comes out. I get it. I also understand that you have had many years of frustration at a school system that perhaps doesn't always meet the needs of your child. As an older sister of a brother with mental and physical retardation, I've seen my parents go through many needless battles. As a parent, I've had to deal with my own share of battles with teachers, administrators and district personnel.

I have been there, so I get it.

That being said, just a piece of advice from one who has been on both sides of this issue. If you always come at teachers like they automatically have it out for your child, you almost guarantee that we aren't going to be very sympathetic when there is a real need. It's kind of like that old story of crying wolf, eventually your yelling at me or anyone else at my school site will be met with a "there she/he goes again" along with a rather dramatic rolling of our collective eyeballs.

Despite what you might think, I didn't go into teaching to make your life miserable. The reason I teach is because I want to help your child be successful. Sometimes success means occasional failures because just like in life, sometimes our most valuable learning comes from falling flat on our faces. It is my job to help your child learn from both and nothing makes this teacher's heart happier when I get to witness that proverbial lightbulb moment.

All that being said, the one thing you should not do is immediately fly into attack mode. Yesterday, when you called me on the phone launching into a tirade against me because your child was tardy yet again and accusing me of not letting her into my classroom went beyond disrespect. You probably didn't notice that during your diatribe, I never once raised my voice, instead I remained calm and told you to please call my supervisor if you had a specific complaint against me. I also politely asked that you refrain from yelling at me, otherwise I would have to end the conversation.

I must say that I was rather shocked to have you tell me to shut up. Believe me when I say that I had to pull from within myself very deeply to continue to remain calm when I informed you that I was ending the conversation. I do have a confession to make. When I ended the conversation with "please have a nice week-end," I wasn't being very sincere. I really do wish that I could have sunk to your level, but that's the thing; I know how to act like an adult. You clearly don't.

Sincerely, Ms_Teacher